J.LAW & R.DOWNEY JR. – DOUBLE RED CARD
FROM THE STYLE REFEREE
MISGUIDED DRESS CODE SUBVERSION AT OWN FILM PREMIERE
Let’s get one thing straight. Am certain Jude and Robert couldn’t give a monkeys what I say about how they look at the Premiere of Sherlock Holmes II. Reckon they might care about style however. They almost certainly suffer from the A-list actor problem of being insulated from reality, (A-Lister Stylistic Insulation Syndrome, also know as AS-LICS). Hence Downey Jr’s (Ben Elton like) shinny suit and designer romper sho-boot. Designer trainers are always a bad thing on the midde-aged. As with most celebrities, no one on their crew ever says, “do you think it’s entirely wise to wear an Action-Gnome hat to your film premiere?”. So they end up doing it*. All the film stuff they’re known for is styled by someone else. Means when they come to get dressed they’re not so sure who they are. Elements here are most agree-able for sure, but its the devil-may-care balls-up of mixing it up where they’ve come adrift. Like the Rake blazer on Law, but then cardy and confused soft-collar shirt are rather limp. The Lanvin tight cavalry officers dress britches and boots are however completely at odds with the uncle-casual thing in the mid-secton, and more so the neck up ‘Rebelious Norwegian-geologist-at-brothers-wedding’ beard/hat look.
Look, it is Ben Elton. Look. That shirt/tie combo. Am I nit-picking? No, I’m bloody not. You’ve gotta look at them and say, ‘Lads. This is a quite, quite pony turn out. You look like jokers the pair of you. Now fuck off to Claridges with your mates for the after party.’ If they were just blokes, you’d look at them and think what a couple of hedge funded euro-pillocks. But they’re A-list actors, so they breeze through, unmolested. Pah! Am inclined to salute belligerence, but they look properly rubbish.
Thing is, when your persona/actor profile things is so strong, its almost best to just nut about in jeans, t-shirt and a nice overcoat most of the time, and look great. Then when its a Premiere put on immaculate black tie or proper cocktail get up, job done. This nonsense above is down to AS-LICS, celeb-clueless-ness and really naff photo-opporunties. Gonna back off now. What would I know anyway? Am sat eating Olives and Taramasalta in Clapton and think I’m sophisticated cause I know about shoes. Yeah right.
Stubbs out.
* We’re all aware of Laws hair line peninsula scenario. Sympathies there, believe. But a good looking bloke like Law should become the master of the Fedora, or at least the pro-active owner of a nice Pork Pie or two.
PS. Thanks to the various fashion PRs who forwarded these pictures.
December 13th, 2011 at 5:29 pm
I know this is a mens site but the black and white striped & dot concoction on the bird is feckin’ awful also.
December 13th, 2011 at 5:34 pm
Not just awful – positively larcenous
… AND I want those curtains back, Miss Ting.
(Saucers of milk all round, chaps?)
December 14th, 2011 at 1:26 am
Well, Jude’s hat is on – and he’s been wearing one since he started filming Anna Karenina – because of the hairstyle he’s having to sport for that film…I don’t think it’s 21st century styling, and probably involves a weave or something to fill in his receding area. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be wearing the hat all the time. The beard has been there since before Anna Christie, then he had to keep it for Anna Karenina. So…yeah, he’s making mega-bucks for his suffering. He’ll get rid of it when Anna’s done.
Also, I like his upper ensemble and his lower ensemble, but not together. He’s still as yummy as Ghirardeli’s chocolatey chocolate brownies with extra chocolate. Mmmmmm…….
December 14th, 2011 at 10:30 am
Your jealousy runneth over, Stubbs. Let’s cut to the real issue here: you resent the leeway actors are given over their dress. You spend hours fussing over collar-shape, lapel-width and so on, agonising over the minutiae of the message your clothes convey. Then you pop down the shops for some dry roasted and the local children run away screaming ‘Mummy! It’s Gok Wan!’
Meanwhile, Up West, Law turns up looking like Him Out Of The Spin Doctors and gets on all the Best Dressed Lists. Why? Because Jude Law does something else. Yes, I know, I’ve seen Contagion, but people still seem to think he can act. And God knows why, but acting is seen as more important/interesting/worthwhile than whatever it is you do. Handing Gary Barlow a shirt, saying ‘put that on’.
So perhaps if you did something else the public deems useful – you know, singing with the aid of Autotune, taking your pants off in Shortlist, that sort of thing – then maybe you would get the recognition you so manifestly desire.
December 14th, 2011 at 10:32 am
Oh, and leave Downey out of this. He’s proper mental and genuinely thinks he looks ace.
December 14th, 2011 at 12:14 pm
Ben Elton, Friday Night Live, 1987.
December 14th, 2011 at 3:20 pm
Tom:
Big fan of this site. But….must admit in the past, before reading this post, I have often wondered what exactly the point of a celebrity stylist is. Always thought it was a bit of an extravagance or for people with little imagination, or people off xfactor (contestants not the presenters). However, these terrible outfits on both protagonists, who to be fair aren’t considered uncool in the slightest, dispels any doubts i ever had.
December 14th, 2011 at 3:22 pm
Actors are pricks. An adult who ‘works’ by doing lets pretend. Cath – Yummy? Dave Law? Do you have a probation officer ? I doubt anyone is jealous of thinning haired prats.
December 14th, 2011 at 6:00 pm
You are in the DM pal http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2073709/Dermot-O-Leary-models-Mr-Porter-blokes-like-Im-short.html
December 14th, 2011 at 11:36 pm
How come the Daily Mail can suggest D O’loverly is short? No way is he short.